Raising a Child with Autism

Raising a Child with Autism

My grandmother rarely talks about raising her third son, who was autistic. He was defined as autistic almost before there was a classical definition for autism. My dad and uncles remember what life was like having an autistic child in the family. The attention was taken away from them, and they witnessed lots of their brother’s temper tantrums. They also remember my grandfather gently cooing, in the hopes that he could calm him down at night, “Mikey Pete, Mikey Pete, you’re so sweet, don’t rock that seat.” Sadly, it never quite settled down their brother.

Ultimately, my grandparents were unable to take care of my uncle, and they sent him away to a state institution, as many other parents of autistic children did in the late 1950s and early 1960s. This was before Sen. Robert F. Kennedy stood on the steps of Willowbrook calling the institution “criminal.” They didn’t know how awful it was. Once they did, it was too late.

Now, of course, we know the price of admitting a child with autism into a state institution. As a result, many parents opt to take care of their children at home, hiring behavioral consultant after behavioral consultant in the hopes that they can manage. Raising a child with autism is very hard work, and at times it can feel like an overwhelming responsibility. Perhaps the most daunting task is figuring out what to do when it is time to sleep.

Many children with autism have unusual sleep patterns that manifest themselves in many different ways. In fact, most research shows that between 40–80% of children with autism have trouble sleeping—they have problems going to sleep, they have problems staying asleep, or they don’t sleep long enough to be considered well rested (about 10 hours per night).

There can be no premium on knowing that your child with autism, prone to wandering throughout the house at night, is safe. It is crucial, as a parent that you have enough sleep in order to make it through the next day. Without the proper amount of sleep, you will not be able to keep up with your autistic child and the other demands of your life. Without sleep, you are setting yourself up for frustration and failure. Yet, if your autistic child routinely wakes up throughout the night, how is it possible to get the sleep you need?

You must sleep, and your child with autism must be safe. How can both be achieved? Some experts suggest locking the bedroom door at night or getting a $10,000 hospital bed with restraints. Perhaps this was a viable option 40 years ago when my uncle was sent to a developmental center, but hardly one for today’s world. There are new and welcoming designs for beds on the market—like Noah’s Bed—that seek to comfort both the autistic child and his or her parents.

The impetus behind Noah’s Bed (and others) is to provide the child with a safe, comfortable place to sleep where he or she can feel protected. At the same time, these beds give parents a peace of mind knowing that their autistic child will be safe regardless what time he or she goes to sleep.